Together Forever Dude
by LargeDude
Summary: Whatever happened to Kurt and Ram after they dysfunctionally tried to court Veronica? Two best buds left all alone in a park with a bottle of wine and rubbing pants. Rated T for language and mild sexual content.
1. Chapter 1

**Hi guys! This is my first fanfic ever published! So feel free to give your honest opinion because I'm looking to be a better writer. Also, I've been listening to _Heathers: The Musical_ so much lately and I got inspired. I looked on here at the fanfiction for it and I was disappointed by the lack of gayness. Hope this solves the plight of all the RamxKurt shippers out there! Oh, I do not own any of the characters from Heathers. I plan on doing more;)**

"Dude, I can't believe she resisted our charm!" whined Kurt.

Ram took another swig from the red wine bottle. Beer doesn't have the nice warmth in his stomach like wine does, but he would never, like, _tell_ anyone that. The guys on the team would kill him.

He slurred, "Yeah, well at least she didn't nut punt you dickhead. Now my balls really are blue".

They both chuckled as Ram drank away the rest of the crimson liquid. His eyelids squeezed shut and then opened extra wide to take in a blurry nighttime world. The white streetlamp at the park attracted a ton of bugs, good thing they weren't interested in them. One fucking fly and he would've been out. Why? Because bugs fucking suck mutated donkey dick that's why.

Kurt burped, getting Ram's appraisal as a follow up.

"Niiice". He drawled.

"Thanks buddy, hey are you still kinda itchy? If ya know what I mean?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"Cuz I was just thinkin' of somethin'".

"Go raid Heather Duke's panty supply?"

"No".

"How bout find out what the back of Heather McNamara's throat feels like"

"No, no girls".

Ram stopped leaning on Kurt's back and sat up.

"Ok then Mr. Harvard degree. Mr. Science Man. How am I supposed to cure a case of my-dick-is-getting-exfoliated-by-my-zipper-itis if there's no chicks involved?"

Kurt scraped his sneakers on the grass as he got onto his knees. His letterman jacket had beer stains on it. His mom was gonna be stoked when she found those.

With his arms out in an explicatory way, he said, "Alright, let me explain. Ok so, check this. What if, ok, instead of doing stuff with other chicks and wasting, like, precious energy and time, we just do stuff together?"

His eyebrows raised and his bottom lip hung out as if saying 'Why not?'

It took Ram a second or two for the cogs to start turning up in his ol' noggin, but when they did…

"You mean like fags, man? No way! We're close bud, but not that close".

He got up and started pacing. What the hell is Kurt thinking? If the team got whiff of this, they'd be history. A once casual and securing arm wrapped around his right shoulder with Kurt on the other end. He had a look in his eye that Ram didn't recognize.

Kurt huffed like Coach did before he was gonna give the team a talk.

"I knew you were gonna say that so check what I'm about to say ok? Hey man, I mean, if girls can make-out together for one night and not be called lesbos the day after, then why not guys? I mean, dude, we're not fags. You know that. I know that. We both have needs. And besides, you're like my main bro. So why not just once, I mean you haven't been curious at least once?"

Ram thought this over hard. And he did not like thinking hard about anything. Not even pussy. So he thought about that one time when he was twelve and had a huge obsession with a couple of the members of the Greenbay Packers. He remembered a feeling he had for them when he watched the big game with his old man. It kind of felt like he was flying while throwing up. He looked at Kurt. Kurt had sandy blonde hair and wood brown eyes. Fuck it, he wasn't afraid. No one was around and it would only be once, right?

"Alright. But we take it only as far as I wanna do it, got it?"

Kurt smirked. "You sound like a chick, man".

He jabbed Ram's arm. He laughed. Ram punched him back.

The laughter died out quickly which then was replaced by awkward tension.

"So like, who starts?"

Kurt shuffled and put his hands on his hips.

"Shit man, I didn't think this far".

They stood there for a minute staring into the ground trying to figure this mess out.

Ram clapped. "I got it. I'll start because I'm the one who's in charge of this".

They nodded and got closer together little by little until they were face to face.

Ram didn't really want to be looking at his buddy when he first kissed him, so he closed his eyes and just did the deed. His lips crashed together with Kurt's. He peeped open one eye to see that Kurt was blushing and still left in suspense for another smooch. Closing his eye back up he continued to kiss his best friend since diapers. Soon enough, the usual sounds of making out came about. The intensified breathing through the noses, the smack-pop sound of their wet lips opening and closing. Ram was startled when he could feel Kurt's hand grab the side of his face, like you do with a girl. Embarrassed, he knew why Kurt would do that. It was because Kurt was taller than him. Only by like four inches though, not like chick-dude ratio. Ram was beginning to like this though. He enveloped his arms around Kurt's back, up into his jacket. The muscles were toned and big, like a football player's should be. By this time Ram had put his tongue into his mouth. He knew all the moves. The double-dip, the tongue tango, the loopty-loo. He'd been practicing them all on girls since the seventh grade. Always been known as a good kisser too, and he could tell Kurt was liking it. There it was again, that feeling of flying while you're puking. It felt so good, he couldn't even think of doing anything else except kissing him. All of a sudden, Kurt pulled away. Ram's world was dizzy and euphoric.

"Why'd…you…stop?"

He barely got the words out he was so out of air.

Kurt was also catching his breath. He coughed and said, "We need to go home man. That's enough for now. I feel like if we were gonna do what I think we were _gonna do,_ then that's enough".

He was right, Ram probably would have let him go farther. Whatever the fuck that means between two guys.

"Wait, what do you mean _enough for now._ Are you sayin you wanna do this again?"

"Like you don't?"

Ram felt his entire face glow scarlet.

"I mean like, *phew*, yeah. But l wanna take this like a slow ride ok? Let's jam and get out of here".

Kurt wrapped his arm around his buddy and smiled.

"Now you really do sound like a chick".


	2. Chapter 2

**Jesus God, HELLO:) ok this one took a while to put out because of writer's block, but I am really happy with the turnout and I hope you are too. Please comment below if you want. All characters are owned by Heathers.**

Ram was having one of those dreams again. One of those special dreams that boys his age tend to have. He knew it was one of those dreams because they always start out the same.

He was at a party, it was bangin', it was rad. Tons of hot, lickable chicks in his perimeter. Next, it always leads to the kitchen where he gets a drink and then after that he meets his hook-up girl. Only this time…it isn't a girl.

It's Kurt.

"Hey stud, think you could show me a good time?"

 _Dear Lord, he's using the line that they say every time too…_

Kurt took Ram by the hand and led him up the stairs away from the party. They found a bedroom where Kurt opened the door and let him go ahead. In dreamlike fashion, somehow the room magically had romantic candles lit all around, and there was a hot-and-heavy playlist on the eight-track.

The door clicked behind him. Turning around he saw that Kurt had his letterman jacket and shirt off, revealing a cream colored muscled body. Ram couldn't control his actions, he was on sex dream auto-pilot. He pinned Kurt against the door and started to suck face. Where the usual chick's tits were supposed to be, his hand wandered up from Kurt's carved stomach to caress his pecs. Ram moaned while he started to kiss his neck.

They began to do a strange backwards tango towards the bed where the finally smacked down onto the mattress. Kurt broke from the embrace and stood at the edge of the bed. He had that million dollar smirk on his face and ran his fingers through his sandy beach hair. Ram leaned up on his shoulders to view the show. He ran his hands down his torso to the top of his pants. The belt practically undid itself. His fingers undid the button, and showed a few curly hairs of evidence that the carpet matched the drapes. It took a thousand years to undo the zipper, and just as he grabbed at the hips of his jeans to drag them down, Kurt began to say something.

"Honey you gotta get up".

Kurt bent down and took Ram by the shoulders and gave him a shake.

"Honey it's Thursday. C'mon you have to get up for school. Ram, I'm serious!"

Ram's eyes snapped open. His mother threw his trusty bomber jacket at his head, covering his way of vision again.

"And make sure you put on some fresh underwear today. I swear if I am doing the laundry one more time and it looks like a BMX track in your underwear I will put you in the home for boys as soon as I can find you, understand?"

He felt another soft plop of fabric on his legs. He assumed it was a pair of tighty-whities from his drawer.

"Yes, Mom".

"You better be out of this house in ten minutes or you're gonna be late for class".

"Ok".

Footsteps went to the edge of the room and shut the door.

The bed sheet surprisingly stayed almost in place as he rolled off the bed and onto the floor face down. An unintelligible groan came out of his mouth. He could say 'fuck it' and stay there all day, but it felt like he wet his pants. And you know what that means. Somebody had a real-life happy ending to his little gay dream last night. Getting to his feet he stretched the elastic out in the waistband of his underwear to see what he already knew was there. Looks like someone spread a marshmallow fluff and vasaline mix in there. Ugh. Now he _really_ had to change out. Mom was a bonafide psychic.

Fuck school. School could give someone a damn break while they were sorting out personal problems. A couple of fried eggs always was a good nurse for a hangover. He cracked four eggs and let em' sizzle in the hot pan. While he waited, might as well invite Kurt over to play hooky too.

Kurt.

Shit.

How was he gonna talk to his bud if all he was gonna think about was last night? First, there was that whole hanky-panky shit, then there was the sex dream overkill. God, he wasn't a fag. But, there was a little red flag going up in his mind. Just about how much did he get aroused by those things? How much did he contribute to the make-out sesh? Why were his pants getting tight just thinking about it?

His hand patted the area where his dick probably was located and felt a lump.

 _Not now._

He ignored it. The eggs were done and needed to be flipped onto the plate. Once on the plate, he salted it, forked it, and shoved it in his mouth. Nothin' like raw protein in the mornin', that's what coach says.

Ram decided not to be a complete quivering pussy and call Kurt. The phone rang and he munched on some tasty eggs.

"Hello?"

With a half-full mouth he answered, "It's me dickhead".

"Shoulda known, what are you doin?"

"Ditching. What are you doing?"

"Same thing. Wanna come over?"

"I'm eatin'. You come over".

"Ok. I'll be there in ten".

"Stoked. Bye".

"Later".

He threw the phone back on the hitch and tossed his plate in the sink.

Ok. Here's the plan. Just remain calm, and don't mention what happened at all. And just keep on doing this every time you see him til the end of days.

Sounds reasonable.

And Kurt would be fine. The hang out would be fine. Everything is going to be _fine._ There was no reason to worry about Kurt…

Except for the fact that _he_ was the one who started it all. Eh, what's the worst that could happen?

….

Ram's mother's couch used to be a nice, evened out, comfortable couch when he was about six years old. Now, eleven years, two older siblings, and a countless number of lays later, not so much. It was lumpy, discolored, and smelled like greasy hair(the last part was Ram and Dad's fault). Nonetheless, it was the family couch, and it was a dear friend. Just like Kurt, who was sitting beside him eggin' on the Packers.

"Come on Jermaine! Get to that fuckin twenty yard line, fuck!"

He usually wasn't so colorful with his language when the game was on, but it was Packers vs Patriots, and Kurt _really_ hated the Patriots.

"Is the ref fuckin' blind? That was totally not unnecessary roughness!"

It was great being around Kurt like this. Just guys bein dudes. Plus, it was always a total riot to watch his neck vein pop out. This is the only time he gets to see that phenomenon. Well…that's not true. Ram thought back, and the only other time he saw his neck vein make an appearance was…when they were making out. He cleared his throat and could feel the blood rush to his cheeks.

Kurt grabbed the remote and muted the tv.

"I can tell you're tense dude, what's goin on?"

Ram felt like Kurt already knew the answer to that one.

"It's because of last night, isn't it?"

"Yeah". Ram sighed.

There was filled silence between the two. So thick you could cut it with a knife.

"Jesus Ram, I thought you would understand. It's my fault. I took advantage of you. But, be honest. You felt something between us right? I wasn't just me imagining it all was it?"

There was desperation in his voice. Ram looked into those brown eyes of his. There was something goin on in there that he wasn't quite sure of.

"Yeah, I felt something that was pretty fuckin real. What are you saying though? Do you love me or some shit like that?"

"Maybe I do".

No way. This wasn't real.

Ram could've left, could've shouted out, or he could've decked him right there. Guy was probably trying to fuck with him at a bad time.

"You don't mean that".

"I think I do".

"Well what the fuck would you go saying that to me for?" Ram got up off the couch and went into the kitchen; he needed space.

Sure enough, Kurt was right behind him. He leaned on his forearms on the island.

"I don't know. I just feel so different about you".

"Oh, and I guess different is just pussy talk that you're a total fag for me".

Him and his best friend now stood face to face.

"Didn't you feel that lightning last night? Didn't you give just as much as you received?"

Ram couldn't make eye contact anymore. His heart was racing. So he stared at Kurt's neck. And his vein was popping out again.

"Ram, look at me".

And he did. He gazed into those brown eyes, and he felt like he was flying.

"I just wish you were the same way."

The blue-eyed jock mumbled something inaudible.

"What did you say?"

"I said I do".

He closed his eyes and his lips met Kurt's like an old friend. His heart was singing a song that was reaching a finale in his ears.

They held each other close and did what only two people in love can do. And good God, it had never tasted so sweet. Kissing made time stand still. Time was theirs and it yielded to them.

Their tongues danced, their hands wandered, they let go and the day was theirs.

Now that they were together though, Ram thought as he held Kurt's right buttcheek in his hand, how is this gonna work out at school?


End file.
